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Lonely hearts club: how to prioritize self-love this Valentine’s

Don’t worry, you are not alone in this situation. Millions of people every year experience Valentine’s Day without a solid valentine. However, not spending the mushy, gushy holiday with someone doesn’t mean you can’t have any fun for yourself! Here are five things you can do with yourself for this upcoming Valentine’s Day. 

Have a date with yourself

Buying Chick-Fil-A in the drive-thru and vacuuming it down your throat alone in your room isn’t exactly a date with yourself. I’m talking about taking the time to pick out a nice outfit, spray on your favorite fragrance and heading out on the town. The best part with this kind of date is that you call all the shots. 

You want to go to the fair and get on the same ride five times in a row? Go for it! It’s your night. 

For a one-person date, I suggest going to the museum, your favorite restaurant or an arts and crafts workshop like the Paddywax Candle Bar in Dallas where you can customize your own candle!

Make plans with friends

Turn your Valentine’s Day into a Palentine’s’ Day. If you are not completely sure about spending the day by yourself, ask some pals to come along. Host a party, go out for dinner or have a movie night; anything you would do alone, do with friends. Invite those who you feel close to and truly care for (and vice versa!) to keep a genuine circulation of appreciation and admiration. 


Spreading love is not always just for the people you know. There could be someone out there who might be desperately needing to just spend some quality time with someone else and volunteering can be a great way to do just that. Try signing up at a local organization that may need help and share the mushy, gushy holiday spirit.

 Sitting down with someone new on Valentine’s might mean a lot more to that person than you think. 

Hand out Valentines

You might not have a valentine yourself, but you can be someone else’s. I don’t mean going out and snagging a card and candy combo box from the grocery store, but instead taking the time to put together handmade valentines for those you love and care about. Food valentines like chocolate-glazed popcorn and cookies made from scratch never disappoint and are almost always accepted by others.

 You could also go the craftier route and make Valentine’s-themed origami figures or custom keychains for your friends and family. Not only will you have fun doing it, but your efforts will also be greatly appreciated. 

Stay in

There are many great things in this world, but cuddling up in a big blanket while eating sweets and watching movies is definitely one of the greatest. For this year’s Valentine’s Day, don’t feel obligated to go anywhere or do anything for yourself or other people. Sometimes the best moments we have in life are the ones where we allow ourselves to relax and enjoy being alone. 

Pick out movies and shows, snacks, blankets, pillows and anything else you might need to prepare for the monster marathon coming your way. A day like this to oneself is 100 percent considered self-care. Push aside your worries for one night and allow yourself to shamelessly indulge!

These are just a few ideas to awaken the Valentine’s spirit that I know is stirring within you. No matter how your holiday turns out this year, remember to stay kind, and to love and appreciate not just others, but yourself as well. 

Gakenia Njenga can be reached via email at

Featured image by Angelica Monsour.

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